Embryo Transfer Prep

With the successful completion of our embryo transfer yesterday, we decided to show the expanse of our transfer preparations. A lot of hard work, calculation, and needles go into the embryo transfer and maintaining the pregnancy itself, and more often than not most people are unaware of how the process itself works.

I'm sure most of you have seen what our calendar looks like, it's very colorful! Each color represents us starting something, stopping something, or going into the clinic for blood work, ultrasounds and other appointments; except for the pink markers, those indicate my lazy days! :) Everything on there is a task we need to complete, an appointment we need to keep, or reminding Jack that he needs to cook dinner for two nights. It's a lot to keep track of, and I'm truly grateful for our wonderful coordinator who dedicates so much time to making sure we know what we're doing and when, and for taking the time to answer my silly questions at odd hours. We love working with UFC and I couldn't have asked for more amazing people to be surrounded by!

Here is a video update detailing how we prep for our embryo transfer!

As always, please feel free to reach out to us with any questions or comments you may have! We want to get a discussion going about infertility in our society and what we can all do to help and encourage everyone around us!

One Week Countdown!

We are ONE WEEK away from our embryo transfer. This is our busiest week for this surrogacy. We'll be adding three different medications, all on different days, and all with varying intensities and duration. It's quite a bit to keep track of, but luckily Tonya, our superstar coordinator, has our calendar all mapped out!

We started this transfer cycle at the end of last month with our baseline ultrasound and blood work. All of our blood tests for now are E2 blood draws, which tests the amount of estrodiol (17 beta-estrodiol) in my body. The first baseline E2 test came back a little higher than they wanted it to be, 183 when they wanted it under 100, so the next day we redrew the test to make sure my estrodiol level was dropping. Our second result came back just they way they wanted it too, so we began our estrodiol injection that night.

But wait, why did they want my estrodiol level low when they were just going to turn around and shoot me up with that very hormone? Great question, the reason why is because they needed a baseline to measure all of our subsequent tests against. If they had used my first E2 result, which was too high, my next E2 test after I had started the hormones wouldn't have been an accurate representation of how my body was taking the estrodiol injection. My baseline ultrasound was used the same way, to show the progress my body was making in preparation for our embryo transfer.

We have weekly E2 blood draws to ensure that my body is still making the progress it needs to be making. So far, they've all been perfect. Last Friday (March 4th) we had our uterine lining check. I was a little nervous, seeing as our first lining check in our first embryo transfer showed that my uterine lining was too thin, and we had to add another hormone medication to help stimulate it. Happily, it seems my body is taking to the hormones even better this time around! Our uterine lining looked perfect, happy and healthy and almost ready for a baby!

As we delve into our one week countdown to our embryo transfer, I'll be updating more frequently as almost every day has a new aspect to it in preparation to our transfer. As always, positive thoughts are greatly appreciated and questions are always welcome! Please don't be shy to reach out at all, this is a subject that affects us all in one way or another, and I love seeing the wonderful community that surrounds infertility and its treatments!

Round 2.5. For real this time!

Another Bump in the Road

A couple weeks ago, during my water ultrasound to ensure that my uterus was prepared for another embryo, our physician discovered a polyp on one of my uterine walls. He believed it was either a piece of placenta that was missed during our D&C, or a growth. 

Obviously, I was really hoping it was just something they missed during the D&C, but after our hysterscopy today that appeared to not be the case. Dr. Foulk determined that it was indeed an endometrial growth, and that it likely played a hand in our miscarriage a few months ago. This realization, frankly, shattered my heart. I'm happy that we found a possible reason for the miscarriage, but all my feelings of guilt and inadequacy came flooding back in an instant. Any positive vibes would be greatly appreciated at the moment.

The staff was kind enough to provide me pictures from the hysterscopy since all of this fascinates me, this is an image of the removal of the polyp. It really is an interesting picture. With this issue addressed we're ready for another embryo transfer. I have more confidence that this next transfer will be successful.

Round 2!

Week 8 Ultrasound

We've been anxiously awaiting this ultrasound since our first ultrasound at 7 weeks gestation (last week.) At our first ultrasound the nurse practitioner had a difficult time locating the baby in the embryonic sac, however, my hCG looked phenomenal so we were cautiously optimistic about yesterday's ultrasound. We all crossed our fingers and held our breath as we she started the ultrasound. Ovaries looked great, and the embryonic sac still looked fabulous and was appropriately sized. The nurse practitioner was still unsure of an area just on the edge of the embryonic sac, so she called the physician in to run the ultrasound. He's a wonderful physician, I understand why our IPs traveled from China to work with him! He looked at the area in question and quickly identified the yolk sac and fetal pole very happily implanted just where they should be. But the victory was short lived as the words, "Shoot, I hate it when this happens." slipped out of his mouth.

He explained that while the baby was well implanted and had all of his bits and pieces just where they should be, that he had no heartbeat. Due to what can only be chromosomal abnormalities, this little boy has appeared to stop developing. Honestly, I'm a little distraught, even after constant reassurance from the staff that there's nothing we could have done to prevent this. My heart is broken for the parents, though they seem to be taking it in stride and are feeling very confident about our next, and hopefully final, attempt.

There are many reasons I wanted to share this journey with everyone. First, infertility is an issue that we shouldn't be silent about. The amount of hurt and feelings of inadequacies that stem from infertility are things that we should be willing to build each other up about. Even though I know in my heart that there's nothing we could have done, or could have done better, to prevent the ending we got this time around it's still difficult to convince myself it's not my fault. I feel terribly guilty, and I know I shouldn't. I know even more that no one should suffer through any loss alone. I'm happy that we are sharing this journey, because I couldn't imagine mourning this loss and not having anyone know that he was there, he was real. I can't imagine how much more difficult it would be if he were my baby. I've said this many times but I will say it until my dying breath: please, please, please know that I am available to listen to anyone who feels like they need someone to reach out to.

Second, the more we talk about infertility and the choices and consequences it brings, the more we can normalize the actions of those seeking help to build their families. There is absolutely nothing shameful about seeking infertility treatments, or offering a helping hand to those seeking necessary third parties for their treatments.

At this time, all we can do is move forward and hope for success with our next attempt. The struggle with infertility is very real and is very much deserving of our attention and understanding. We're moving forward with our D&C procedure this weekend, a tender mercy I'm very grateful for. I couldn't imagine waiting to miscarry on my own knowing that the baby has already passed, a process that can sometimes take up to 5 weeks without medical intervention. Our coordinator believes it will take about 4 weeks for my blood to return to normal so we can restart with the preparations for a second embryo transfer. As always, positive thoughts and encouraging words are appreciated. Here's to round 2!

Week 7 Update

Today was an emotionally challenging day, to say the least. This morning I was so excited for our first ultrasound. The parents joined us via Skype for their first glimpse of their little boy. But as the nurse practitioner started the ultrasound, she quickly fell quiet and kept scanning the same area over and over. We all stopped talking and all I heard was silence. Silence. No heart beat that we'd all been waiting so anxiously for. The NP said she couldn't find a baby in the embryonic sac, and advised an hCG blood test to see if my beta levels were still progressing as they should. My coordinator reassured me as they were drawing my blood that he could just be very small or hiding on the edge of the sac, I am only 7 weeks along after all.

After an entire agonizing afternoon of waiting my hCG results came back... at a number so high their machine couldn't measure it (over 25,000)! We're taking this as an encouraging sign, because it shows that there is continued development, as well as a great sized embryonic sac. I'm hoping that we just have a hide-and-seek champion, or a very shy little boy, on our hands. We have another ultrasound scheduled for next Monday. Every day counts this early in the pregnancy, so he will be much bigger, hopefully, the next time we try to look at him. As always, I'm grateful for my sweet, supportive husband for being my rock. Here's to positive thoughts!